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My son is three and has just been diagnosed with aspergers, he's a textbook case apparently, and he is increasingly violent. Everywhere that I have read it says it's anxiety and that I should try to eliminate the stress. For him it is seeing his father, who he barely knows, at his father's place surrounded by people he doesn't know. His violence is getting worse and harder to manage. He was ok, still a little violent but never as bad a meltdown as we have now, when the visits were at our place and he knew I was around. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be doing in this case or what is best for my son. How do I help him cope with this? I can't find any information on this topic so I don't know what to do? It seems that your son's anxiety stems from his visits to his father, who he barely knows. These visits are difficult for him and this is creating behaviors that are hard to manage. There may be a few ways to handle this situation ... . . . keep reading My son with Aspergers doesn't want to eat at school. What can I do? Eating problems are very common in children with Asperger's Syndrome. There can be a variety of issues that cause a child to deny themselves food. Digestive problems, social discomfort, and behavioral problems are all real and possible concerns when it comes to the nutrition of the child with Asperger's. Since your question specifically asks about eating at school, these problems are probably not the cause. If any of these issues were present, your son would show an aversion to eating at other times and not just at school. The likely cause of your son's aversion is ... . . . keep reading How can I get help with respite/child care for my child with Aspergers? There's no question about the love you feel for your child, but let's face it. Caring for a child with Asperger's Syndrome can get stressful, tiring, and lonely. When you find yourself avoiding social situations because you're uncomfortable leaving your child, it's time to find an alternative plan. You can't spend 100% of your time caring for others without time to care for yourself. When preparing to take a plane trip, the flight crew reminds the passengers to apply their own oxygen masks before assisting others. In other words, you will be worthless unless you take care of yourself first ... . . . keep reading I have Medicaid and there is no treatment for my child except through the county and they are backlogged two years. We are only receiving school counseling. It is a nightmare. Do we have any rights to appeal? Medicaid is wonderful when it works. Even though this health care option is a federal program, each state is responsible in part, for funding the program. Because of this, each state has developed their own guidelines for eligibility and services. Children with disabilities are usually accepted into the Medicaid program as their primary health care coverage ... . . . keep reading I want to teach my son to live with Aspergers to independently and to understand that every action has a reaction, such as not paying your rent leads to eviction; not signing grant papers leads to losing your support, etc. How can I help my son work on these issues? As a parent, your goal is to see your son grow up and move on, exhibiting the full ability to live independently. It is wise to make plans and ask these questions while your son is still young, giving both of you time to meet the expectations of the future. There are many resources available to assist you in this endeavor. We'll go over some of them here to allow you to formulate a plan ... . . . keep reading How do I get daughter with Aspergers to accept help? Getting your child to accept help is difficult for any parent, but can be especially problematic for the parent of a child with Asperger's ... . . . keep reading I have a 15 year old daughter who has Aspergers. We are having all sorts of trouble getting her to follow everyday rules, especially where school is concerned. She is already onto her third school in 3 years due to her resistance to following the rules regarding makeup, phone and basically the dress code that is required. Also a lot of her problem is her social inability which causes a lot of concern because we have been having major dramas with her making and maintaining friendships due to her high demand and control issues. Do you think that I should put her back on some sort of medication to try and de-stress her a bit as we are slowly running out of options? Most parents want to try every behavior modification possible to try to change unwanted behavior before they turn to medication for their child. In this instance, it sounds as though your daughter is having a great deal of trouble dealing with the boundaries and rules of home and school ... . . . keep reading How do I help instill confidence in my son with Aspergers as he continues to grow? (He's a young adult now.) Kids with Asperger's Syndrome can definitely struggle with a lack of self-confidence. These kids are targeted by their peers in so many ways. They sometimes come across as 'too good', needing strict adherence to rules. They can also be highly intelligent, causing them to be labeled as 'brains'. Sometimes clumsy, kids with Asperger's are just different enough that the other kids at school resort to picking at them. Bullying is a huge problem for kids with Asperger's. Add in the inability to make good social connections and you have a definite risk for low self-esteem ... . . . keep reading Will my son with Asperger's be able to cope with college? More and more teens with Asperger's Syndrome are graduating from high school and making a seamless transition to college. Adjusting to college can be a challenge for all teens. Your son will be no different in that aspect. There is every indication that your son will be able to modify his thinking with a few guidelines and some help from you ... . . . keep reading My son with Aspergers has a few friends at school, but the kids come from everywhere. My son has never had friends at home, so he just hangs out. Another problem is that he only talks about binoculars. Also, he refuses to read. Any advice please? Social isolation is a common issue among kids with Asperger's Syndrome. Communication struggles compound the problems these kids have when it comes to making and keeping friends. Specialized interests and the need for precise routine and order make peer relationships difficult. It's hard to "go with the flow" and be part of the gang when the essence of your being is so restricted. Your son could benefit from ... . . . keep reading My grandson is five and a half years old and is in the process of diagnosis for Asperger's Syndrome. There are real issues at present with his toilet behaviour. He is unable to wipe himself after using the toilet and although this is dealt with at home and during his first year in primary school, now he is in year one the staff are refusing to accommodate his need for support in this area. Where does my daughter stand legally with this issue please? Afterall does the school not have a 'duty of care' and encourage progress in this area. They appear to have no understanding whatsoever of the issues surrounding this condition and I know my daughter is embarking upon a long and arduous struggle in order that my grandson has a happy experience throughout his school day. Even today, many schools are unprepared to deal with issues presented by children with Asperger's Syndrome and other autism spectrum disorders. Much of this comes from the schools and teachers not being educated about the special needs of children with Asperger's Syndrome ... . . . keep reading I am having a rough time right now with my 12 son with AS. He started puberty in the 4th grade and since I am his only parent...he asks/tells me everything! So with all these hormones raging and the characteristics of AS, my son is a bit out of control. He has, what I guess you would call, anger management issues. Not like a "normal" teen would have. No matter what I say, as or do is right. He gets very defensive when asked something as trivial as did you brush your teeth! Can you give me any ideas. His medications were recently changed because of this and he hasn't been on it long enough to see if it is going to work. Do you have any information on Abilify? He is much taller than me; I can still handle him when necessary, but I am the only person that can get him out of a true AS Meltdown. Can you help? Adolescence is a traumatic time for all teenagers, but for teens with Asperger's Syndrome it can be a very challenging period. It can be a very difficult period of time for their parents as well! Adolescence is a time where the social demands on teens can become overwhelming. Teens with Asperger's can struggle with social frustrations, depression and loneliness, and anxiety. Add hormonal issues on top of all this, and life with a teen becomes nearly impossible! . . . keep reading My child with Aspergers does not play well with other children. Is there anything I can do to help him? Playing is learning. Babies play with their fingers early in life, then move on to their toes and before long, they are playing with toys. Each step shows growth, progress. Eventually, the baby will add people to the equation, attempting to share his fun. Children with Asperger's Syndrome develop the early play skills, yet begin to struggle when it's time to involve another person ... . . . keep reading My teenaged son with Aspergers has left school and has no job or plans for college. How can I get him to be motivated to do something with his life? Motivating a teenager to do anything can be a real chore. Teenagers have reached the age where they think they are smarter than their parents. This is true of all teenagers, including those with Asperger's Syndrome. It can be a source of contention in any household. Things do get better, but until that happens, you'll need a plan ... . . . keep reading I really want to know what makes my son with Aspergers happy and I want to be able to help him with this. It is heartbreaking to watch a child who used to laugh and love learning, withdraw into himself and not know how to interact with peers. Every parent's dream is to watch their baby grow into a happy, well-adjusted child. You are right. It is heartbreaking to watch your child suffer. Thankfully, there are things you can do to get your son back on a happier, fulfilling course ... . . . keep reading Even if my child with Aspergers is able to make friends how can I teach him what to do to keep them? Relationships mean give and take. For most people, making friends and keeping them go hand in hand. For people with Asperger's Syndrome, friendships on all levels can be difficult. Making friends is the easier concept. Human nature is all about making friends. Keeping friends is a whole different ball game ... . . . keep reading How do I get other family members to understand that his behaviors are not deliberate? In addition, some people do not understand that when the child with Asperger's does something unacceptable he is very remorseful later. What can I do? Children with Asperger's Syndrome do things that the rest of the world considers excessive, unkind, or just plain mean. We call them rude. We label them as weird, quirky, aggressive, and sometimes crazy. When a person is not educated on a condition like Asperger's and they don't see what it looks like daily, they can be quick to make judgments. You hear more about Asperger's Syndrome lately, but not everyone knows exactly what it is. Let's face it. Asperger's Syndrome is complicated. Even if you have a child with Asperger's, it still can be difficult to shed light on all that the condition entails. Here are a few tips that will help create peace and understanding within your family. . . . keep reading How should I help my son who I suspect is being bullied at school, but school officials are not saying too much about it? As a child with Asperger's Syndrome, your son is very susceptible to bullying by others. Being just a little different can be devastating in the school setting. Your son is an intelligent person, but those struggles with sensory issues and social skills make him stand out. The other kids do not understand what this means, so they take advantage ... . . . keep reading My son gets so distraught when he gets a bad mark in class -- how can I help him with this? He's 11 and has Asperger's. Pushing for perfection is a very common characteristic in children with Asperger's Syndrome. The need to do things right, every time, is overwhelming. When it doesn't happen, it can be a disaster. Feelings of despair can lead to extreme anxiety and depression since as we all know, perfection is impossible. It is so difficult to watch your child struggle to meet his expectations. You cannot make him see that he is setting unachievable goals; he really doesn't understand. This creates such a helpless feeling for a parent. With that said, there are ... . . . keep reading I have an 18-year-old son with Asperger's. He has just finished his first semester of college living away from home. He did very well with his grades. He has made a few friends and joined some clubs. My concern is that he says he wants to go on an internship this summer. He seems very interested in it but he just can't make himself write the essay that he needs to for this application. We have tried to encourage him but he is having trouble getting started. What can I do to help motivate him? I would also like to see him get out of his room more but he seems to have problems with this also. He wants to make friends and do things with others but he has a hard time getting started. Any suggestions? Your son seems to have done well with his first semester of college and has survived his first living experience away from home! This is exciting for any parent, not simply the parent of a child with Asperger's. His grades were good and he has joined in structured social activities and has made a few friends. These are great things and things that should be celebrated! Many children with Asperger's find it difficult to ... . . . keep reading More